June 24 2010; 2:35am
I am quickly learning that if it keeps you up at night, it is usually important.
This is the second time in the past month and a half that my mind has lit up with ideas and possibilities just as my sleepy eyes hit the pillow. It is incredibly annoying, and undeniably exciting. I am gaining a better vision about what kind of life I lead and what type of stories can come from the decisions that I make. And for the first time in a long time, I can envision the possibilities and these possibilities even seem feasible. They seem interesting. Even inspiring. I don’t know what motivates people to greatness. I wonder if it is the dreams that whisper in our ears as our mind begins to slow down before sleep. They tell the stories that are written on the backsides of our eyelids and the in the innermost parts of our hearts. When we let them, the dreams tell us to keep thinking, going, moving, and doing all the things that make us feel alive and connected. Yet, somehow, we have convinced ourselves that our “real world” – the one we wake up to every morning – won’t support the life that we long to lead. This is the life that stirs our very souls out of sleep and spurs them into action.
I like to think that listening to these late night dreams will lead to greatness. I don’t know. All I know is that if I am up because my brain just won’t let me sleep, there is something important moving around through the folds. I am, for the first time, feeling a genuine inkling of excitement about the upcoming months. One that is not muddled by stress and details. It was there – for an instant. And it was good.